Wednesday, March 26, 2008

~Not Left Out~

In this house, Not Left Out means more than one thing. On Easter Day, the girls all dressed in their cute dresses. I am shooting pictures of the oldest three, Baby Dels was eating some baby food with Daddy. I stole her midmeal for a few pictures, but by the time I added her in the picture, the oldest three didn't want to sit still OR smile anymore~ they just wanted candy. SO because I didn't want to leave Baby Dels out of the Easter pictures, because I wanted pictures of her in her cute dress too and because she was happy, smiling and making her new funny face~ here are some pictures of her in her Easter dress...Not Left Out~


AND because I decided I needed some time away from being Mommy, I signed up for a beading class. I invited some Sister in Laws and we went out for a Girls' Night of beading. It was great. We sat with no children, a glass of wine and some great giggles and conversation. I highly recommend it AND look at the bracelet I made...
Very beachy, just in time for my Spring Break trip. I have been playing with beads and jewelry for awhile now on my own. I could handle the basics, I can throw a pair of earrings together, but it sure was nice to go to a class, get out of the house and interact with others and learn how to make this correctly, ask questions to a person~ not Google. I am planning some more classes, so I will keep you updated on my progress. My longterm goal is to learn how to make jewelry well enough that I can do this on the side, something that is mine, something that doesn't sing the alphabet, Old McDonald had a Farm, or require diapers. Don't get me wrong, I love caring for the children, I love that I can stay home with them, I would not Dream of raising them any other way, BUT it has been almost 7 years now of me being home, washing laundry, doing dishes, vacuuming floors, changing diapers and when it comes to those Holiday Parties and people ask me that question, the one I dread..."What do you do?" I have a hard time keeping my smile and saying Oh so Kindly..."I have 4 children under the age of 7, what the HECK do you think I do ALL day...eat bon bons, watch Oprah, blog, sleep in, drink wine with my feet up on the table." Ok, so sometimes I wish I could say that but I don't, I bite my tongue and simply reply that I stay home with the children. The conversation usually ends there, I have no work to discuss, no career, no college alumni status to boast about, and they don't want to hear about the boogers I found on the wall, the number of blocks the 3 year old stacked or how many times the baby nursed. On any given day this doesn't bother me, Holiday Work Parties, I cringe. I dread the question. I wish I ran into other mothers like me at these functions, but I don't.

AND then when I get home I am reminded that I have it way better than anyone...I'll bet they aren't sitting at their computers right now trying to type while having Strawberry Shortcake flavored pink sparkly lip gloss applied ALL over their lips. When I started writing this, I was thinking I would say I took the beading class to not feel left out from the adult world. To not feel left out from a "normal" conversation. Boo hoo to me. But you know what, I just realized something, maybe it's the scent of the strawberry lip gloss taking over my brain, but isn't that what it is about? The fact that my daughter didn't want me to feel left out. Everyone else in the house has this Beautiful lip gloss on, she didn't want me to be left out. Forget the Holiday party question, forget the insecurities that come with not finishing college, I have it great. I have an amazing family and I wouldn't trade that for any "I Love Me" wall full of accomplishments. My "I Love Me" wall is scattered across the fridge. Maybe I am not the one Left Out after All.

26 comments:

Mary said...

girlymom......gorgeous pictures of your babe! She's so happy and so darn cute! Love her pink dress too:)

Good for you for getting out there and taking a class like that! And pretty bracelet too! I hope it works out for you.

Way to remind yourself that you DO have it great! You have a beautiful family that came from YOU! That's the best "wall of accomplishment" that anyone can have!

Have a great day :)

Courtney said...

I wish I could stay home with my kids and tons of other women are probably feeling the same way just don't want to admit it.

Btw, you should check out udesign jewelry. It sounds a lot like what you're looking for.

Beth said...

Very cool bracelet! And I think a little "me" time always helps us to remember how good we have it!

Perri said...

Nothing quite like having I love you spelled out in bright refrigerator magnets to put us in the best mood ever.

OHmommy said...

"AND then when I get home I am reminded that I have it way better than anyone"

Yup. I say that to myself often. great perspective.

I love your no child left out act. I am having a hard time keeping the albums equal with all three kiddos.

Cecily R said...

Love the pictures (she is adorable) and love the perspective.

KATE said...

I think you put into words what so many of us Stay at HOme Moms are feeling! I completely understand hating to answer that question, & you're SO right it's so much worse at husband work parties! & when you get the "nod" like oh that's all you do...
But, you're right on again about how we do have it the BEST! There are SO many days it doesn't feel like it, but I love Strawberry Shortcake lip gloss & it doesn't get any better!! There are days I feel my mind has gone to mush as I lay on the floor coloring with crayons, but I wouldn't want it any other way!
Thanks for reminding me!! We can be the uneducated moms together!!

BTW - I love the bracelet & I love making jewelry! How fun!!

Becky said...

Oh, girlymom...she's a dollbaby!

Nevermind what folks at parties ask or think about mommyhood, girlymom. You are doing the most important job in the world as mommy to your beautiful daughters. And you are doing a phenomenal job of it! Your little girls are so sweet to each other...that sort of thing doesn't just 'happen'. It's a result of very good training. You just keep on keeping on, because one day, at those same parties, the folks that were so bent on their careers now are going to be wishing that they had taken the 'time' to focus on their marriages and families instead. They'll see the interaction your lively, beautiful family has, and all the beautiful grandbabies you'll eventually have, and will wish they'd gone the same route.

And for the record, your bracelet is FAB. Do it! Start selling those on the side...GirlyMom Designs...sold in fine boutiques all over the East Coast... ;)

Valarie said...

Amen, sistah!!
Oh, and your baby is freaking adorable!

Chelle' said...

If it helps you at all... I finished college and have the 20+ thousand dollar a year debt to prove it... and like you- I am a SAHM and have no wall full of accomplishments from the world.

I pay my school loan with a smile on my face (and usually peanut butter on my jeans from the little hands that ate it)

I'm with you... There's no Boo Hoo about it.

Mari said...

Baby Dels is sooo cute! Speaking as a working Mom - I bet those who work are wishing they were home like you!. Love the bracelet too!

Happy Days said...

Great post Girlymom! I can sooooo relate! I think I need to take a beading class or something like it!I love your girlybaby! She is sooo precious!

Are You Serious! said...

♥ It's always fun to have a girls night out! Cute pictures!

Amy said...

You rock, girl! Dells is too cute for words! Oh yes she is. Every once in a while, I have a pity party for myself and wish I was doing something worth while, then that wave of "whatever" leaves me, and I am reminded of just how lucky I have it! It IS all worth while!!!

The beading class sounds fun, but the wine sounds even better!!!

Lisa said...

You are such a good mom. I can just tell....you are high quality!!!

Sometimes I get in the "poor me" mode, but then I think there is no other place in the world I'd rather be...and it will all be over way too soon!!!

I'm going to go get one of my girls to put some princess lip gloss on me :)

Lisa said...

PS - Beautiful bracelet...and Dels looks too, too cute!

utmomof5 said...

Amen sister!!!!!! It is easy to forget we are doing the most important work there is. Raising the next generation may not be glamorous but it is God's work.

kim-d said...

About those Holiday Work Parties; I wish I was at the ones you go to because I think you would be the most interesting person there! As far as I'm concerned, the only thing those Holiday Work Parties are good for is free food and getting home and realizing that's where the best people are! However, it is imperative that you have your Girls' Night Out regularly; I personally think that makes every Mom a better Mom! And if you decide to do the jewelry thing, it will be nice to have that as all yours. And I'll buy a pretty bracelet from you :)!

And to close...I love girlybaby's new face...how funny is that anyway? She's precious; her squeezability factor is VERY high :)!

Joanna said...

Ugh. I hate the dreaded and what do you do question.

Amy said...

Dels is very cute.

I love the beading GNO idea. Especially since it included wine. Great bracelet.

Lizzy in the Burbs said...

Hi, Girlymom!

Yay! I got back just in time to see the Easter pictures! How adorable are all the girls, and especially little Dells?! Her sideways open mouth is too cute! She looks like a -little baby bird waiting to be fed! Hope you all had a really nice Easter!

I know what you mean about the party comments, I've smiled through clenched teeth for years! I think the brainless things people say to stay-at-home moms are said mostly out of ignorance, so I try to forgive and make nice, but it's hard sometimes! You're absolutely right, though, you DO have the best life right now, so enjoy it! It's nice for you to get out with friends and good for you, too. I agree with Kim-d, I'd buy a bracelet from you, it's pretty! Talk to you soon, and thanks for all your kind words!

Lizzy

R Family of 4 said...

What a beautiful message. I feel that same way too but it is always nice when you can gain some perspective. Thanks for giving me that today :-)

Steph said...

We all need to be reminded once in a while, huh? I need it more than most. But I do love my little brood! And am so grateful for them.
Cute baby!!!

Vixbil said...

What a lovely post and gorgeous pix.
Thanks

Seven_Shades_of_Red said...

You're so funny!!!

Baby's faces were hilarious too!

LaskiGal said...

Oh, Girly Mom--I love this post. You echo so much of what I feel. I have only been doing this for 7 months (to your 7 years) and I have these feelings often. Yet, I would never TRADE it for the world.

But, I am also realizing that it is important to have something other than boogers, dirty diapers, Old McDonald for me. Just a little something . . .

I love the bracelet. I will be buying it or something like it from your Etsy store as soon as it is up and running :)